Yeah so the blogging keeps getting more and more infrequent. I am guessing the 2 people (hi mom) that read this probably are not returning because the content is old and boring.

Apologies.

I have been consumed by much lately. Which is weird because I am “doing” less. It seems my attempt at freeing myself and my time for summer has evolved into me needing more time to do the “nothing” that I want to do. I spent 4 hours at the pool on Saturday, doing nothing, I have watched all 3 seasons of Arrested Development. I have played with my daughter. I am trying to get a “project” going with 2 friends as a creative outlet, (albeit slow going) All things that I deem good, but when I sit down and look at the stuff that I “should” be doing…the list keeps getting longer.

So I guess the point here is trying to find that line between over doing everything., and finding time to enjoy the life that I have. Really, if I could get my head around the whole thing, I think I could write a book and millions would read it…because that line between Life and Responsibility is so thin. I know why the filthy rich hire people to do the cooking, and cleaning. I would love to have someone serve me in this respect. I hate the responsibility of life. If I could be a kid for eternity I would. It’s a good thing I married my wife, because she is a but more of an adult than I am….but just a bit.

I am about to be 35, and I think I’m heading toward a 1/3 life crisis. But not the kind where I run off with a younger woman and buy a corvette. The kind where I am trying to let my inner kid out and maintain that I am still an adult that can perform the functions of my job…

Contrasting this wave of behavior and thinking is the entire spiritual journey that I have been on for that last 3+ years. I know that getting to where I am mentally and spiritually has been a process that was designed by god. Sitting here in this space of trying to figure out how to be a 35 year old kid, and looking at how my life has been affected by the journey I have been is a conflict (I think). I want to share with people how my life has changed, how I am a different person, and how my marriage and life have been healed. I am also scared to death to let the two of these “people” (kid mike and spiritual journey mike) become one. I am not really sure why, but I am. I think it might have to do with the 2 worlds of mine starting to collide.

Bottom line: I want to be fully engaged with my family, and the world I travel in. I want to be able to blow off responsibility and play marbles with my daughter, and I want to create something that is life altering and globally reaching.

Maybe i should lower my expectations....

Be Nice To Your Kids

I live in a big city, with lots of people and many different kinds of moms and dads. So many times I see people interacting with their children in unkind ways. Many times I have wanted to put a sign up on my front porch that says. “Be Nice To Your Kids”

One day I was walking home and I heard another dad talking to his 3 year daughter. He said “I’m not going to be manipulated by a f*cking 3 year old” I don’t have any idea what they were discussing, or what was going on there, but the kid was crying, the dad was pissed off, and the whole thing (to me) seemed un-necessary. I am not here to judge, I am simply using this as an example. I am not always patient and loving with my child, but there has to be a line right?

Respect. That’s what it comes down to. I think we should treat our children like they are humans. Not treat them like little adults, but treat them like they have worth and value. They are little impressionable people. Everything you say or do affects them.

Yesterday I had to make my daughter a grilled cheese sandwich…and we were out of bread, so she began to get upset. I sat down, looked her in the eye and said “I know you want a grilled cheese, so I tell you what….i have a way to make the best grilled cheese you will ever taste, and I don’t have to use bread”….she was confused, and intrigued. Validate their emotions (for the curious, I used a bagel that I cut the “ends” of the of, slathered it with “butter” and made it that way)…I could have been like “ listen I don’t have any bread, so you are going to get a sandwich the way I make it like it or not.

She would have been on the defensive, and not interested in the sandwich because it was an alternative that she was not invested in. The way I approached the situation made her interested in this amazing sandwich. In the end, she loved it. Now, its not the same with every kid, I know this. I am simply using this as an example of how to figure out the best way to engage your children.

Treat our kids like human beings.

Another day I was walking home and I heard a parent from inside their home yelling “shut up you f*cking little bi#ch” also heard were the screams and cries of what sounded like a 2 or 3 year old girl. I wanted to go in that house and beat the crap out of whoever was talking to that kid. It is amazing to me what people think is acceptable.

So again I say. Be nice to your kids. If you treat them with the kind of respect you expect for yourself, they will begin ( I assume) to model that kind of behavior. I am not saying give your kid equal vote, stake, and say in every situation, that’s not what I am saying. I am saying, treat them with respect. If you shut them down, or push them aside for your “agenda” then I feel this squashes the spirit, and shapes a developing identity poorly.

So, come on people, Be Nice to your kids. They have value, they have worth.